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Sure, Pal ('69 #1) Page 3
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The back of my car was full of Sienna’s stuff, and I was about to drop it off at her house. Maybe there was something in there that she needed. I could bring it to her at the hospital. Then it wouldn’t be weird for me to stop by alone.
I pulled up to her parents’ house and popped my trunk. I reached for the zipper on Sienna’s backpack, then hesitated. I definitely shouldn’t go through her stuff. As I stood there in her driveway, wondering what I should do, a phone started to ring.
Her phone was in her bag. Sienna would want that. I pulled it from the backpack and slid it into my pocket, then I carried her sleeping bag and backpack up to her front door.
Sienna’s dad answered the door, looking exhausted. “Who are you?” he asked.
I’d met the guy several times, but he clearly didn’t remember. According to Ava, Sienna’s parents hardly noticed their daughter existed.
“I’m Evan, Sienna’s friend. I brought her stuff from the camping trip.”
Her dad nodded. “Okay. Thanks. You can set it here.” He pointed to the entryway and turned to walk away.
“How’s Sienna doing?” I asked as I set her stuff down by the foot of the stairs.
He sighed. “Fine. She’s fine.”
What an ass. His daughter almost died. I definitely needed to visit her. “Glad to hear it. Have a good night.” I turned and headed back to my car.
Twenty minutes later, I stood in the doorway of Sienna’s hospital room and gripped her phone in my left hand. She was asleep. Her long, dark lashes fluttered against her pale cheeks, and her reddish-brown hair was a tangled mess. She looked adorable and very much alive. That was all I needed to know. I’d just leave the phone on her bedside table and slip back out.
As soon as I set the phone down, Sienna’s eyes drifted open. I grinned at her. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I thought you’d probably want your phone.”
Sienna gave me a sleepy smile and said, “Hi. I’m glad you came.” Then her cheeks flushed pink, and she sat up with wide eyes. “Evan! Hey! Wow, thanks!” She frantically ran her fingers through her tangled hair.
I laughed out loud. “Did you think I was someone else?”
“Ha! No. Um, don’t look at me! I’m a mess right now.” Sienna covered her face with both hands after she failed to smooth her hair.
I shook my head with a smile. “No, you’re not. Anyway, sorry to bother you. Like I said, I figured you’d want your phone.”
“Thanks,” she said through her fingers.
I was about to leave, but I didn’t really want to. “Do you need anything? Did you already eat dinner? I know hospital food sucks, so I can go grab something for you if you want.”
“Oh my God, I’m starving!” Sienna let her hands fall from her face. “Ava stopped by earlier, and I asked her to go get me a burger and some fries, and she turned up her cute little nose and gave me a lecture about eating meat. She offered to get me a salad, or just the fries. I told her to go to hell.”
I laughed and shook my head. “I’ll get you a burger, pal. What do you like on it? Bacon? Cheese?”
Sienna smiled. “And tomatoes. Oh, and pickles.” She sighed and leaned back on her pillows. “I love you.” Sienna sat up quickly and said, “Whoa! Not like that! I mean you’re awesome!”
I laughed again. I laughed a lot around Sienna. “Okay, I think there’s a fast food place across the street. I’ll be right back.”
When I returned with the food, it looked like Sienna had managed to tame her hair a little bit. I smiled to myself and wondered if she was trying to look nice for me. Of course not. Sienna didn’t think of me in that way. She never had, and she never would.
I set her burger and fries on her tray. “Extra pickles and bacon, just for you.” Then I turned to leave.
“You’re going to make me eat alone?”
I froze and turned back to look at her. “Oh, do you want me to stay?” My heart was beating faster than it should’ve been.
Sienna’s cheeks turned the lightest shade of pink. “Oh. Um, you don’t have to.” She stared at her hands. “Thanks for the food!”
“I’ll stay.” I walked back over and sat in the chair at her bedside. “But you’ll have to share your fries.”
Sienna flashed me a grin and said, “Deal.”
“So, I saw your dad tonight. He is…”
“An asshole?” Sienna’s mouth was full of fries.
I shrugged with a grin. “I mean, you said it. Did your mom stop by? Ava said you hadn’t seen her yet.”
Sienna sighed. “Not yet. My dad said he’d call her, but she gets lost in her art.”
I grabbed some fries and nodded toward her phone that sat beside her. “Your phone was ringing right before I brought it over to you. Maybe that was her.”
Sienna frowned. “Uh, yeah. Maybe.” She reached over to pick up her phone. “Wow. It was her. I’m honestly shocked.” Sienna held her phone to her ear and listened to a message. “Wow. She’s on her way over.”
I watched Sienna with narrowed eyes. I was pissed that she had to wonder if her parents cared about her.
Sienna caught sight of my face and burst out laughing. “What’s wrong with you? Why are you all mad?”
I shook my head. “I feel like your parents should both be here right now. It bugs me that they’re not.”
Sienna shrugged and looked down. “It doesn’t matter. I’m fine.” The sadness in her voice made me ache to wrap her up in my arms.
I almost did it, but then my phone rang. It was Ava. I stared at the phone for a minute, wondering if I should silence the call or answer it — wondering if I should choose Ava or Sienna.
“You gonna answer that?” Sienna asked.
I met her gaze and felt my heart start to race. I wanted to choose Sienna, but I didn’t know what she was thinking. She always left my head spinning, and my heart pounding. The stakes were so high with Sienna, and I was too afraid of falling.
I swallowed and gazed into her eyes. Then, like a dumbass loser, I smiled and answered the phone. I chose Ava again because she was the safer choice. Ava didn’t scare the shit out of me. Ava made it obvious how she felt. There was zero risk.
“What’s up, Aves?”
“Where are you? I’m at your house, and your mom doesn’t know where you are. I thought you were dropping off Sienna’s shit like an hour ago.” Ava sounded a little whiny. I pretended not to hear it.
“Oh, I stopped by the hospital to bring Sienna her phone. I figured she’d want it if she’s stuck here by herself all night.”
“Aw!” Ava gushed. “You are the sweetest! So are you on your way back now?” Ava lowered her voice and said, “Charlie’s watching that dumb show, and she keeps giving me weird looks when I don’t laugh.”
I laughed out loud. Charlie was probably pissed about having to hang out with my girlfriend. “Yeah, I’ll be there in a few.”
“K, love you, baby.”
I glanced over at Sienna. She was eating her burger and staring out the window at the dark parking lot. “Love you too,” I said as quickly as I could and hung up the phone. “So,” I said to Sienna. “That was Ava.”
“Figured.” Sienna still looked out the window. “I mean, unless you and Rob have decided to take your bromance to the next level.”
I laughed out loud. “We’ve thought about it. Is Rob a good kisser? I’ve heard that you would know.”
Sienna turned to look at me with wide eyes. She ignored my question and asked, “So, what’s Ava up to?”
“She’s watching Parks and Rec with Charlie.”
Sienna glanced at me, unsmiling. “You better go save her.”
I sighed. “Yep. When is your mom coming?”
Sienna gave me a wooden smile. “I’m sure any minute. Go rescue Ava. I’ll see you at school next week.” Sienna held up her hand for a high five. “Thanks for my phone and the food.”
I returned her high five, wishing it was a hug, and said, “No problem, pal. See you soon.” I sto
od to walk out just as Sienna’s mom arrived. Good. Sienna wouldn’t be alone.
I shook her mom’s hand and walked out the door, turning to glance at Sienna one more time before leaving.
Why didn’t I have enough courage to choose the girl I really wanted?
6
Evan
I dropped my soccer bag on the sidelines and jogged over to join my team for practice. Senior year was shaping up to be damn near perfect. My soccer team was still undefeated, halfway through the fall season, and college scouts were coming to our next game.
“Heads up!” Rob yelled as a soccer ball sailed toward my face. I head-butted the ball back to Rob. He laughed and yelled across the field. “Nice, man!”
For the next hour and a half, Coach McAdams drove us into the ground, but I loved every minute. He ended the practice saying, “Get your asses home and in bed so that you’re ready for the game tomorrow morning!”
I drove halfway home after soccer practice before I realized I left my bag on the field. “Ah, shit,” I mumbled and made a u-turn. When I reached the park, Coach McAdams and my teammates were long gone, and the parking lot was almost empty.
I ran over to the field and found my black bag sitting right where I’d left it. I flung it over my shoulder and headed back to my car. Then I spotted a girl sitting at the top of a hill with her back to me.
Was that Sienna? I decided to say hi and headed up the hill. I stopped in my tracks when I heard a guitar playing a sad little melody.
I took a few more quiet steps so that I could see Sienna’s profile as she sang.
There’s somethin’ that I meant to say
Been on my mind since yesterday.
I should have told ya
I should have told ya
She closed her eyes as she sang, and her clear, sweet voice was heavy with emotion. Damn, Sienna. The sun was starting to set, and it caught the coppery tones in her dark hair. I leaned against a tree and smiled while I watched her sing. She looked beautiful.
But it’s too late now,
‘Cause you belong to her
She’s the only one you see
There’s nothing left for me…
I should have told ya
I should have told ya
I meant to tell you yesterday
That I’m in love with you
And I can’t make it go away
I should have told ya…
Sienna ended her song and slowly opened her eyes. She let out a deep breath and wiped a single tear from her cheek. That song meant something to her. I wanted to know what. She loved someone. I wanted to know who.
I started clapping.
Sienna screamed, “SHIT!” and threw her guitar to the ground. She clutched a hand to her chest, and when she saw me, she burst out laughing.
I laughed and walked over to her tree, collapsing next to her. “Did I just give you a heart attack, pal?”
Sienna laughed and nodded. I loved her laugh. “Just a tiny one.” She leaned forward to pick up the guitar she’d flung away from herself. “You seriously scared the shit out of me, dude! How long were you standing there?”
I shrugged and grinned at her. “Long enough to find out that you are a secret genius musician. How did I not know you played?” I nudged her with my elbow.
Sienna smiled and stared down at her hands. “I don’t know. No one really knows. I found this guitar in my grandma’s basement last year. She said I could keep it, so I started watching Youtube videos and teaching myself how to play.” Sienna glanced over at me with a shy smile and nudged me back. “Don’t tell anyone, k? This is super embarrassing.”
I grinned at her. I seriously couldn’t stop smiling. I always felt this way around Sienna. “What? Why? It’s so fucking cool, Sienna! You’re incredible!”
She shook her head, but her smile got a little bigger. “No, I’m not! I suck!”
“Not true. Your voice is awesome. You going to sing in the talent show next month?” I asked.
Sienna laughed. “Hell no.”
I grinned and teased, “I’m pretty sure Ava thinks you’re going to do a slutty little dance routine with her.”
This time, Sienna threw her head back and laughed. “Double hell no!”
Her shoulder brushed against mine. I wanted to wrap my arm around her. It seemed so natural that I almost did it. A light breeze lifted a few strands of her hair, and I wanted to run my fingers through it. We sat in silence for a moment, watching the sun set against the bright green soccer field.
Finally, I asked, “Did you write that song?”
Sienna’s gold-green eyes flashed over to meet mine. They were full of fear and uncertainty. “Uh, yeah. It’s dumb, though.”
“It didn’t look like you thought it was dumb. It looked like it meant something to you.” I met her gaze and felt my heart rate pick up.
Sienna tore her eyes away from mine and shrugged.
“Who was it about?” My voice was quiet.
Sienna shrugged again and looked out at the empty soccer field. When she turned back to look at me, I could have sworn her eyes said, “You.”
I had feelings for Sienna, and these feelings were unlike any I’d ever had for a girl. I’d figured that out almost a month ago, but I kept dating her best friend anyway. I hated myself for that.
Sienna stood up suddenly and said, “I better get home. It’s getting late.”
I nodded. “Sure, pal. I’ll give you a ride.” Sienna didn’t have a car. She usually walked everywhere or rode around with Ava.
“Thanks.” Sienna smiled at me and picked up her guitar.
I grabbed my soccer bag and glanced over at Sienna as we walked. Was I falling in love with my girlfriend’s best friend? Or had I always been in love with Sienna?
I already knew I’d asked out the wrong girl two years ago. Ava was hot, fun, and safe. But Sienna was like this deep, beautiful, unknowable mystery. She scared the shit out of me when I was fifteen, and she scared the shit out of me now.
We drove in silence with the windows down. I was too rattled to speak, now that I’d admitted to myself that I was actually in love with Sienna. When I pulled up to her house, we could hear her parents fighting from the driveway.
Sienna bit her lip and let out a shaky breath. “Thanks for the ride, dude.” She gave me a fake, bright smile and pulled open the door.
I didn’t want her to have to go inside and listen to the fighting. I didn’t want anyone or anything to hurt her. “You hungry?” I asked. “I didn’t eat yet, and I’m starving.”
She paused with her hand on the door. “Uh, yeah, actually.” Sienna slid back into my passenger seat and closed the door.
I grinned at her. “Good. And Ava’s not here, so we can go get big juicy burgers.”
Sienna laughed and leaned back. “Oh, Ava. She’s going to save the cows, just you watch.”
I laughed, too, and backed out of Sienna’s driveway. After we went through the Jack in the Box drive-through, we pulled into an empty parking lot to eat. We sat on the hood of my car and looked up at the dark night sky.
“When are you going to start driving the Camaro, dude?” Sienna asked between bites of her burger.
I shrugged. “My dad thinks it’ll be ready in a few weeks.” I reached over and stole some of Sienna’s fries.
“The hell?” She shoved me. “You have your own!”
I laughed. “You got more, though. It wasn’t fair!”
“Dude, life’s not fair!”
I grinned at her and nudged her with my elbow. “Whatever you say, pal.”
Sienna smiled at me. “Why do you call me that — pal?”
I paused for a minute. “I don’t really know.” I started calling her that in eighth-grade Algebra. It was my sad little way of flirting with her without any game. In retrospect, I realized that I should have started calling her “beautiful” or “cutie,” but I was an idiot.
I glanced over at Sienna. She watched me with narrowed eyes. I laughed
and said, “Because you are my pal. We were friends even before Ava, and I’d like to think we’ll be friends after Ava, too.”
Sienna burst out laughing. “After Ava? Oh, dude. There is no ‘after Ava.’ That girl has your wedding planned already.” Sienna’s smile looked sad. She shifted a little bit and then asked, “Why did you say, ‘after Ava?’ Are you guys okay?”
No, we weren’t. I wanted to break up with Ava. I’d thought about it a lot over the last several months, but I kept losing my nerve. Ava was one of the hottest girls in our school. I honestly didn’t know a guy that didn’t want to fuck her. I just didn’t want to anymore. It wasn’t really fair to Ava. Or me. Or Sienna.
I gazed over at Sienna and almost said everything that was on my mind, but she held up her hand and said, “You know what? Never mind. I’m obligated by best friend code to tell Ava everything you say to me tonight. If it’s bad, just…” Sienna bit her lip and looked up at the sky again. Clouds were rolling in. “Just do it quick, like a band-aid. If you give her any reason to hang on, she will, and it will hurt her more.” Sienna met my gaze again, her beautiful gold-green eyes burning. “I don’t want to see Ava hurt.”
I nodded and stared up at the sky as the rain started to fall. I loved rain, but I slid off the car and got ready to go. Girls didn’t like getting their hair wet. When I looked over at Sienna, she had her face turned up toward the sky, with her eyes closed and a soft smile. I grinned at her. “Do you like rain, Sienna?”
She smiled. “Hell yes.”
I laughed and sat next to her again. “Me too. I think playing soccer in the rain is my all-time favorite thing to do.”
“It’s just like, cleansing, isn’t it? Rain makes me feel like all the terrible things in the world are being washed away.”
I laughed out loud. “That is way more poetic than what I was thinking. I just like to watch and feel the rain.”
Sienna smiled at me as the rain picked up. Her eyes were full of excitement — alive.
Fuck. This girl made me feel things. But she shouldn’t. Even if I broke up with Ava, Sienna couldn’t be mine.